My friend...

Guyana Gyal notes that in one country horses and carts have been banned from the roads. G then asks what this might mean for the rickshaw but I can't see how you'd fit one in a can.

Ice Age art...

"arrival of the modern mind" is on at the British Museum in London and I'm gonna miss it! Boo hoo. Many items are carved from ivory or bone and show animals and imaginative half animal and half human creatures such as the 'lion man.' The oldest pieces are from 40,000 years and demonstrate in their beauty and craft that humans back then were capable like us of abstracting the world into symbols and signs. These ancients were closer to nature than us and particularly keen to represent and objectify the animals they observed, lived among, hunted, domesticated and ate.

Like us these ancient types were particularly fond of horse and this is ably shown through many horse sculptures including one labelled simply "Can". An abstract piece "Can" asks us to think of horse but in a can. We are challenged to imagine not only a can but within it a horse or part thereof. Are we so removed from our grizzled forebears sitting at the mouth of some damp cave carving shapes? Lips pursed in concentration to help them better classify food. This most prescient piece reaches across 40,000 years to ask a fundamental question as important then as it is now: just because it says horse on the label can we be sure it's horse in the can? Of course, the question today is one of beef on the label and horse in the can but I think we catch their drift.

Donkey found in

horsemeat, shock. A relative of the deceased, pictured, told the BBC. "Now look here. On Sunday he went for the papers now he's in the papers and as the family understands in the pies too. We always knew he'd go far just never thought it would be with gravy." 

Benedict the Umpteenth...

resigns, shock. Speaking to Associated Press a Spokeshorse for the Society of Canned Goods said, "We hope a limited edition will reach the shelves by Tuesday."

Horse found in...

lasagne.





Speaking for the bereaved family Neddy Big Horse said, "He was definitely told Bologna. Clearly, something has gone very wrong."

Dung beetles navigate...

by starlight says latest study.

"It's true." Says Valerie Dungbeetle, pictured. "Pushing shit can play havoc with the back which is why it's important to keep a straight line. And we've been in the shit business for a long time, so we know. Why only last week my cousin Vinnie Dungbeetle confused by the asteroid flypass stumbled, the ball rolled back, Vinnie got stuck in the moist and off they went down the sand dune, all antennae, flailing legs and crazy bug eyes spinning into the darkness. I mean, he wasn't a pretty sight to begin with. Not seen him since nor expect to. It's a tough profession. Some say it's shit. And they're right. It's why I'm a Darwinist, incidentally. No God, no matter how focused on the detail could dream us up."