Bits of John Bosco...

are currently touring the UK sealed in a glass coffin and attached to a life-size wax figurine. With no hint of irony the Catholic Herald claims this event fulfils the saint's wish to visit Britain. That JB is dead and beyond fulfilment appears an issue they've magnificently avoided. I think it's fair to observe that some 150 years ago when the blessed JB expressed a hope of reaching these shores he assumed it would be in one piece. I'm confident a saintly eye brow might have been more than raised had the suggestion been put to him that, yes, he would come here but not quite in the fashion expected. And how might one have explained to the venerable John that this same sainted eyebrow, lifted here in puzzlement, would indeed visit the UK but not with the rest of him. The eyebrow of course is pure speculation because it's not clear from the publicity which part, or parts, of John are here. It is unclear how much of John actually remains. I've seen a hand mentioned but is it left or right? Does it matter? It no longer matters to John that's for sure and here dear reader, lies the rub. As John's reputation for saintliness has grown then so his remains have shrunk. Those legs that once carried this hardy Christian soul are now lost in the mists of time along with his trunk, shoulders, head, both arms and the other hand. Who needs such trivia when you've a bedrock of four casters supporting a good trolley? Not the Catholic Church and certainly not their long departed priest. As the hallowed remnants of our desiccated deacon are dragged up and down these martyred byways can we really declare the opportunity for digital mischief will not multiply? After all, even a relic needs a rest from the razzmatazz. Getting that hand through customs on the way out might yet turn into a nightmare.