visited my little home to look at a wall crack. Five years ago the gable end to my house was becoming detached and had to be re-pinned. These blokes came round with a van and lifted floorboards, drilled holes, poked things through, twisted metal into brick, secured rods onto joists, one per metre front to back on the first and second elevations. They had certificates and letters after their names, were members of guilds and stuff. One of them arrived today (fulfilling his obligation to their 25 year guarantee of workmanship) and declared my wall unmoved. Said he thought the crack (to describe it as .5mm would be generous) was a bit of shrinkage on some duff plastering I did a couple of years ago. Hey, the man's in a guild, he speaks the truth. It was a relief.
I called the engineers originally after becoming worried the gable end might fall away when I was on the loo. Think of how distressing that would be. A double whammy, house wrecked and eternal shame in one fell swoop. Sod those crushed under falling masonry. People might see me doing my business.
The current crack is situated opposite the loo in the bathroom. I sometimes worry that I'm being watched, maybe through the crack. I tried explaining this to the engineer but he said it was unlikely. Unlikely? I took comfort from the fact he might be an expert on gables but knew bugger all about ga ga.
7 comments:
Lol Have you tried going outside and seeing if you can peek through the gap?
Sounds like an expensive second opinion on your plastering, but well worth it for peace of mind.
Came via GG's blog. Nice place you have here. :)
Sandy,
Welcome, have a look around. There's beer in the fridge, help yourself.
ugh- I just HATE the things that can go wrong with houses. am a bi† of a nut on the subject - prone to many paranoias (rooted in home truths, I might add, but a teensy exaggerated. maybe.)
well worth it to get some square-handed bloke who reeks competance to give an opinion.
glad you're up and at it.
oh - by the way - in case you're needing something fresh to be neurotic about - they are now studying whether the common cold is connected to memory loss.
As I write there are naughty, nosy little Guyanese children out there, peeping.
Hey thanks for the beer, mighty neighbourly of you, had a look around but didn't make a mess. :-)
Be back to see your photos I hope!
Hayden,
For God's sake don't set me off! Any creak and I think the place is falling to bits. I am though comforted by the engineers seal of approval. Not sure how long it will take to wear off though.
G,
I really am fearful there's things in the walls watching me. Think I need to up the dosage of my medication.
Sandy,
Photo's will start appearing soon and maybe even tomorrow as I'm off to Liverpool to take more photos of the Anthony Gormley exhibition.
HAHAHA what do you imagine, Dan? Eyes without heads? Snakes? No, don't up your medicine, it will smother your imagination. Let it run wild Dan, let it run wild.
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